Mystical Truths Podcast
Welcome to Mystical Truths Podcast.
A show about how the core truths of life can unlock the relief and ease we all want. No fluff. Just honest, relaxed talks about "the stuff of life", intuition, happiness, calming your mind, life now, life after life, LOA, your inner being, and so much more.
Hosted by Rebecca Troup, an accomplished teacher and intuitive life coach.
In each episode, Rebecca shares life-changing insights, stories, and guidance about why we are here and how to navigate this big world. She invites questions from guests and all who are curious.
In this accelerated time of change and conflicting information, the truths really can set you free! Let's unlock your world.
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Mystical Truths Podcast
They Calmly Chose to Die
Today's conversation with Kimberly Aluise takes an amusing look at signing off from a physical life experience, just because we can. No fear, no escapism, no distress. Just a calm readiness that speaks volumes. We lightheartedly explore the extraordinary ease that two of her grandparents exhibited (years apart) as they independently decided to do the unusual, just die. Neither was considered terminal. Each was very "fixable" but knew that "fixable" was not their next step, so they let go and quickly withdrew from this lifetime. How easy is that!?
The best part is, our recording was interrupted by a clear sign that her grandparents were in the conversation with us. How fun is that!?
Kimberly's grandfather was a World War II veteran whose staunch resolution to meet death on his own terms challenges us to consider the autonomy we each hold over our destiny. His story, along with the tranquil passing of her step-(related)-grandmother will leave you to ponder the essence of a 'good death'—one marked by humor, dignity, and ease. Tuning in, you might find yourself reflecting on your own beliefs about life's final chapter and the peace that can come from a departure that honors an individual's wishes.
Listen in as Kimberly shares her tender but humorous experience of hearing two different people say, "I know my condition can be treated, but actually, I'm good to go."
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Audiorezout. 14.Be Happy.mp3
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Welcome to the Mystical Truths Podcast. This is Rebecca, and I'm really glad you're here. Let's unlock your world. There are two sections to this show that I normally would have edited out, but I left in because this is not the first time that the show has been interrupted with a sign from Spirit. So it's fun, it's interesting. The first is when we actually had the interruption. The second is when I told Kim that I was going to go ahead and leave that in, so I thought that part of the conversation should be left in too. So check it out. Here we go On today's show. I invited Kimberly Aloise to come on and talk about her grandparents passing, because we got into a conversation about her grandmother passing, her grandfather passing and I just found it really interesting that there was so much ease and understanding in the passing. So welcome, Kimberly.
Speaker 2:Hi Rebecca, Thanks for having me. I'm glad you're here.
Speaker 1:So tell us, take us to sort of the beginning. You had power of attorney for your grandmother.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, and my grandfather, yeah, for a really long time. So this is my paternal grandparents, my dad's parents, and just to give like a little bit of background, my grandmother was actually my step grandmother, so biologically she was my great aunt. When my biological grandmother died she was very young. Her name was Marietta, so I'll just refer to her as Marietta because that makes it less confusing when I'm saying grandma. But when Marietta died she was very young. She had children still at home and she knew my grandfather would remarry again. So for her, from her perspective, her and her sister were very, very close and she had asked my grandmother to marry her husband after she died so that someone would be able to take care of her children. And can you?
Speaker 1:explain to them, explain to all of us, why that was so important then. Because today maybe not so much, but why was it such a big deal? She knew she was going to die.
Speaker 2:She wanted her sister to marry her husband Because, yeah, my grandfather was a very I mean, it was a long time ago. So back then, you know, my grandfather wasn't about to take care of the children and clean and cook and do all those household things. He, in his mind, had to have a woman and my grandmother feared that he would take whichever one came his way and she desperately wanted to make sure that her children had someone that actually loved them and would take care of them. So, yeah, I mean that's, and my Marietta wanted that. And then my grandmother she was already pushing 40 or 40. She was unmarried. So she basically did it for her sister and the kids.
Speaker 2:I mean, she got married to my grandfather. She wasn't in love with him. He wasn't in love with her. They did have a very difficult life together. She did. She had a difficult life with him, but yeah, so that's kind of the background of it. So she technically she's my step grandmother, but she is biologically related to me. Yeah, I know a lot of people had a really, really hard time with it and their family actually sort of really struggled with it. They ended up actually moving like three hours north of here and lived there most of my life because it was just easier than dealing with all the judgment from everybody.
Speaker 1:Because they married pretty quickly, right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they married pretty quickly. They stayed here for a while. It was like six months after Marietta died that they got married, because at that point my grandfather said that my step-grandmother could not keep coming over to the house because people were going to start talking, and so that's when they said, well, okay, we'll just make this official now, because six months have gone by whatever because we it's.
Speaker 1:You know, six months have gone by, whatever, so they did stay living here probably about six, six or so years, before they finally did move away a little bit which is really interesting, because back then everybody knew that a lot of the men had to have a woman if they had children, because, like you mentioned to me before when, when we talked that you know he would even need her to get him a cup of coffee, or you know, just wasn't the guy that contributed a lot to the family.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he was very difficult. He was difficult for my biological grandmother as well as my step grandmother. He was a difficult man.
Speaker 1:So it's funny that you know grandmother he was a difficult man. So it's funny that you know back in that day a lot of people understood or would have, I think, understood if they really knew the story why that situation occurred.
Speaker 2:but yet they were judging them. I think there was a lot of embarrassment behind it all for everybody. In a lot of ways, that kind of stuff did happen a lot back in the day, you know.
Speaker 2:I mean, I've researched my family genealogy back hundreds and hundreds of years and, believe you me, if a spouse died, the remaining spouse remarried very quickly. It was a necessity really in a lot of ways, you know back then. So, yeah, I didn't find out until much much later in life. I always had an inkling Um, marietta died before I was even born, but I always had an inkling that there, that this is something that Marietta wanted. And later on in life, my, my step-grandmother did confirm that. They had had a talk about it and she really did this for her sister and for the kids, and she took a lot of heat. A lot of people really were not nice to her about it. So it is tough, but, yeah. So, year, years pass and at this point, 2011, my dad had passed away and by that point, my grandfather had had four children. My step-grandmother did not have any biological children of her own. She just had her nieces, or her niece and nephews, as her stepchildren. And by this point in 2011, when my dad passed away, by that point they had already buried three of their children. So their three sons had already died. Their daughter was still alive, but they had a rocky relationship with her. So sometime, even before my dad died, my grandparents had made me their power of attorney and so at this point we decided that it would be best for everybody if my grandparents were to move in with my mom, who was their daughter-in-law, because my mom had a big house and this way they would be closer to me and it would just be easier to manage because they were now in their 80s at this point.
Speaker 2:So 2017, my grandmother was 89, a couple months before her 90th birthday, and she got sick. She kind of had been in and out of the hospital here and there a little bit, but it's important to note that she was very short minded. That woman had a memory unlike anything I have ever seen and she was very much 100% mentally competent. So she was having some issues and they'd gone to the hospital and the doctor told her she had like a touch of pneumonia and she had a reoccurring bout of C diff, which, for anybody who doesn't know, it's like an intestinal bacterial thing. That happens if people are taking antibiotics. Sometimes, if people have been in the hospital, it's contagious, so they can contract it. So she's at the hospital and they're kind of doing whatever they do at the hospital and at this point she says that's enough, I don't want any more treatment, no, I'm ready to die, this is enough now.
Speaker 2:And by this point I had made it up to the hospital and I was talking to the doctor and the doctor's telling me I really, you know, I know she's upset, but like this is fixable, I could just give her an antibiotic and send her home. This is treatable, like she's, she's fine, really she's fine. And my grandmother's, you know, kind of telling the doctor, telling the nurses, telling me she's like no, I'm done, I'm ready to die now, like everybody needs to, like just get on board with it. And I guess the thing is is like it was all such matter of fact conversation, right, it wasn't, like anybody was. I mean, we're sad because you're sad, because that's the human emotion to it right.
Speaker 2:But it was very matter of fact. She was ready to go and we must have really all kind of felt that because at that moment my grandmother wanted to call my daughter, which would be her great granddaughter, to talk to her because she was going to die. So we had to call my daughter at work and I remember my grandma's on the phone with my daughter and she's like you know, talking to her. She's like hi, honey, it's grandma, I just wanted to call to tell you. I'm sorry, I'm going to cry. She's like, I just want to call. I want to call to tell you that I love you. I'm going to die now. You'd be a good girl, you know, and my daughter's kind of, you know, upset, she's kind of, you know, telling her goodbye and and and everything. And my grandma was just very matter of fact about it.
Speaker 2:It really wasn't. From our perspective, from like my myself, my husband, my daughter, my brother and not maybe not so much my mom, but you know somewhat my mom, my brother and not maybe not so much my mom, but you know somewhat my mom we're all really okay with this process. I mean me more than all of them. But we were like, okay, this is how this is going to go down. I remember at one point her telling me that my grandmother telling me that she was seeing her father and you know her father's obviously deceased or no longer in human form. I should say she was saying you know, I know this is going to sound crazy, I'm not crazy and, believe you, my grandma was not crazy. But she's telling me she's seeing her father and I'm saying to her no, grandma, trust me, I do not think you're crazy and that's good, that's a really good thing.
Speaker 2:So that night they cause the doctor was like, look, I mean I could send her home. She's fine, I can fix this. Yeah, exactly, and for whatever reason, like I said, everything kind of it just played out the way that it needed to play out. You know, calling my daughter feeling that need, that urgency, that she, my grandma was very insistent. She wanted to talk to my daughter and and it had to be like now, couldn't wait till after work, till she could come up, it needed to be now. So they decided to let her stay at the hospital. She stayed that night and then the next morning they moved her to another room and by the time I had made it up there the next morning she was already like not able to talk.
Speaker 2:You know, she was already like eyes closed kind of laying in bed, and so we all still talked to her anyways, and by that night she had died.
Speaker 2:And it's funny because you know the doctor and the nurses are like well's fine, like I don't know, like she, she made the decision, like she honestly made the decision. Rebecca, like at this point, after everything that transpired in her life, after where she was at, yes, her condition was fixable, but she was ready, it was her time. She was seeing her father who was going to welcome her over, and she got to say goodbye. Like how great, how great was that. She said goodbye to every single one of us and and and, just so, like all right, I'm just so matter of fact.
Speaker 1:Okay, honey, I'm going to die now when you first told me that I thought I just said I just love that. I just love that because that's what we all should be doing. We should, we should just be saying, hey, you know what? I'm going to go ahead and die now.
Speaker 2:Honestly, she and I loved it, because I love that she was a woman who, in her entire life because prior to getting married to my grandfather, she was a caregiver for her parents, for her sister who was dying she kind of always did what she needed for everybody else and she often did not have a choice in the things that were done to her or her circumstances, especially living with my grandfather and so in her final moments, she got to decide. And her final moments she got to decide, she got to choose and she did it gracefully, without resistance. And I've seen people die, I've seen them linger and linger and linger, and I'm sure it's because there's resistance and with her there was none. It was like okay, I'm done, I love you all. And I remember saying to her and I've said this to other dying people I was saying to her okay, grandma, I love you, I'll see you when I get there. And her saying okay, I'll see you when you get here. And that's to me that's just awesome. I think that's just such a great thing. Yeah, so that was 2017.
Speaker 2:And then, in 2019, two and a half years later, my grandfather, who was now 95, my grandfather, like I said, he was a difficult man. He had been an alcoholic for a very long time. He had been in World War II. He, as you can imagine, his life growing up was just different. He grew up in a house where they had no electricity, no running water. He lived in a cabin. Up until he left for the war he had no electricity. You know what I mean. Whatever so, his life was very different than what we know today.
Speaker 2:Some time probably about, maybe 15 years prior to that, maybe 10 years prior to that he had developed some stomach issues and periodically maybe once a year, once every two years he would have to go to the hospital because he would get like an intestinal blockage. And at the time and over the years, the doctors would say they weren't really sure what the blockage was. They knew there was a mass there but he was never able to get. I don't think he ever got like an mri, like maybe he got like a ct scan or whatever, because they had suspected that he had shrapnel remaining in his body. Because when he was in world war II he had been next to a landmine that had went off and he got hit with a lot of shrapnel. That was a long time ago.
Speaker 2:They removed what they could, but there was suspect that there was always some remaining and that with his intestines and I don't know the arteries and the blood flow and stuff every once in a while I don't know the arteries and the blood flow and stuff Every once in a while it would get blocked. I think probably so many years before 2019, they even came back and said maybe it was cancerous mass. If it was, it was slow growing, so this would happen periodically. So on this particular occasion in 2019, he had his 95th birthday in August, so this was now October and, like I said, he was living with my mom. So they got him to the hospital and the doctor at that point was saying to him you know what, let's go in surgically and see what the heck's going on there.
Speaker 2:If it is, you know, a mass, we can remove it. Let's try to figure out, like, what we could do, because it was very, very painful for my grandfather and he was tired of dealing with it, like you know. Like I said, even if it only happened once a year, I think it had happened maybe six months prior to that event. He was tired of it and so at that point my grandfather was saying nope, that's it, I'm done, I'm ready to die. Now, like I don't want to fix this, to tell you more about my grandfather. He was a very physically fit man. He was 95. But if you didn't know that he was 95, to look at him he looked 75, right, physically, I would say he could pass for a 35-year-old. Up until the day of going into the hospital he was mowing the lawn.
Speaker 2:We had caught him a week before my mom had caught him, like a week before my mom had caught him with a stepladder out in a tree with a chainsaw cutting off branches at 95 years old, wow, um, very physically fit man, right and, and mentally he was competent, he was fine, you know. He was mentally aware of everything that was going on in the world and so he had made this decision. He was like, no, I'm done now, like this has been long enough, like I'm ready for this to be over. And so once again, I find myself at the hospital talking to the doctor and the doctor's just like for the doctor, like this was like insane, right, because he felt that again this would pass, like these blood vessels and stuff, I guess they would shift and then, like you know, they would get his intestines, kind of like, get the blockage and be able to send him home or do this surgery. And he's like your grandfather at 95, I am 100% confident will recover from this surgery. He is physically fit and mentally fit. He's like this isn't going to be a problem. And I'm like, well, you know, he's saying he wants to die.
Speaker 2:So, and then sometimes, when, like I talk to people, like you know, I'm talking to the doctor and he's looking at me like I'm absolutely insane, right. I'm like, well, he's ready to go, so let's just you know. And they kept asking him over and over again Are you sure, are you sure that you don't want this? Are you sure this is what you want to happen? And my grandfather's like, oh, my God, how many ways can I tell you, people, I'm ready to die? And so, like you know, I talk with the doctor and stuff. I go and talk to my grandfather and my grandfather's telling me he's like look, what do you want me to do? Like, you tell me what you want me to do. And I said, look, grandpap, if it were up to me, I'd want you to live, to be 100 or more. I think that would be fun. But what do you want? I will support whatever you want to do. And he's like, well, I'm ready to die. And I said, well, all right, then let's die. Then let's die, let's do it.
Speaker 2:I love when like the medical staff look at me like we're all absolutely insane, but I hope that it leaves them with some food for thought.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:And that's really, I think, what I always hope that comes out of these types of situations. Yeah, so at one point he was going to eat and then he made the comment to my mom and he was like, well, wait a second, if I eat, is that going to like slow down the process of me dying? And my mom's like, yeah, I think so. And I'm like, yeah, I don't know. He's like, well, I'm not going to eat that. No, last meal.
Speaker 2:No, he's like I don not gonna eat that, wow no last meal he was like nope, no, he's like, I don't want any food, then I'm gonna go, I'm gonna do this thing. And so, um, the nursing staff, again the hospital was like okay, like I mean, we can't just keep this guy in a bed, like we gotta do something with him, so this could take a while. They said you know well, that's what they said. They're like this could take a while, he's fine, he's not like. They like was just so astounding. I remember like the nursing staff being like, wow, your grandfather's like 95. He's like, he's like in such great shape, like we don't see 95 year old people in here. They're like so like good, like mentally and you know, physically, and joking around and everything, like he's telling jokes, you know.
Speaker 2:And so we got in contact with the hospice and they came and they transported him over to hospice and so I think you know we're talking like 48 hours, whatever, like he gets transferred. We're at the hospice and you know, at this point he's not eating. He was, I think, having like ice chips a little bit. We're all carrying on our conversations and everything.
Speaker 2:So the first night he was at the hospital we left, came back, they moved him to the hospice and he wasn't there long. I think he was there for one night and then the next day I was going to go back. My brother was going to see him and it was interesting because I was going to go back to the hospice with my daughter when she got off work and my brother had called me to tell me that he was on his way to the hospice to see my grandfather. And my brother called me and he said Kim. He said on the way here. He's like I'm thinking about grandma and marietta and he's like I'm. They're telling me they're on their way to him, like they're on their way and my brother was like kind of.
Speaker 2:And I know my brother was like really surprised and I'm like, oh, I said that's so awesome, david, I'm like you. You got like they came to you, like you saw them, that was them. And he was like, well, why would they talk to me and not talk to you? It's perfect, it's absolutely perfect that you had that experience. And so I kind of knew right then, when he had told me that I was like, okay, they're on the way to like greet him.
Speaker 2:And so my brother was in the room with my grandfather. He got to the hospice, he was in the room with my grandfather and they were having a full conversation, like at this point, like my mom had been there, my aunt had been there, like we'd all had been there. My grandfather was having normal everyday conversations. He could see out the window, there was lawn care, people tending to the lawn and he was talking about them and, you know, telling us different lawn care tips. One more thing before I go I know exactly, and so, and even the staff at the hospice was like I mean, you know, I don't know how long this is going to be, because the dude's fine, he's not eating and really drinking. So that is going to you know, especially the not drinking thing. But but they're like, yeah, he's fine.
Speaker 2:So my brother had got there. My brother was with his wife and his granddaughter and they waited in like the waiting area. My brother went in with my grandfather and my brother said they were having a full-fledged conversation. And at one point my grandfather said to my brother and I'm trying not to cry when I say this my grandfather said to my brother and he was completely cognizant, totally aware, eyes open, full conversation. And he says to my brother always sorry. He tells my brother always be good to people, give when you can and it'll come back to you.
Speaker 2:So my brother was like sorry. My brother said to my pap. He's like sorry. My brother said to my pap. He's like you know, that's that's really nice, like I, you know, I will, I will do that, that's that's great. And my grandfather kind of closed his eyes a little bit. So my brother said, pap, I'm going to go out. He wanted to take his grand granddaughter outside because she was in the waiting room and he told my grandfather that.
Speaker 2:You know, I was on my way there with my daughter and my grandfather said, ok, that's fine. So my brother left the room, got to like the little family area and walked outside. And by that point I had called him and said hey, we're pulling into the parking lot, we're here now. So my brother said OK, I'll wait for you at the door then and you know I'll walk back to the room with you. So I get out of the car, meet my brother. We're walking back to the room and as we're walking back to the room, the nurse walked out of the room and she said I'm so sorry. She said I'm so sorry, your grandfather's passed away.
Speaker 2:My brother said my brother's colorful language. He, he was like what the F? I just talked to him five minutes ago. He's like no, maybe six, but I mean we just had a full-fledged conversation and you know, so we kind of at that point my daughter, you know, she cried because she had wanted to see him one last time. And you know, of course you're emotional's the human side of you, but at the same time as we're crying we're also laughing. My bad, because for us we're just like, yes, like we're going into his room and like we're all like trying not to make spectacles out of ourselves. You know, kind of just like dancing around. It really was, it really was perfect. Around, it really was, it really was perfect, it really was great. I mean, how, how awesome is that?
Speaker 1:it really is, especially when there was nothing killing him no, no, he was fixable.
Speaker 2:My grandmother was fixable. He was fixable and I understood more with my grandmother because she had such a hard time with him. He was a really difficult man for her and I know that really wore her down, but they were both fixable, especially my grandfather.
Speaker 1:I mean, I'm telling you Nope, you just cut out you there. I can't hear you. Check to see your. It says your app is not focused. Check to see if your screen went black.
Speaker 2:What just happened.
Speaker 1:Okay, now I can hear you.
Speaker 2:I don't know how that happened.
Speaker 1:What happened?
Speaker 2:I'm just sitting here, I'm not touching my phone. No, I know how it happened. So a song started playing while we were talking. Do you know what song it was On?
Speaker 2:your phone yeah, on my phone, and literally I pushed the button to get to see what the heck was going on. And then it stopped and it the song picked up right at this part. It was Just Breathe by Pearl Jam, which is one of my all-time favorite songs, and it was the line at the very beginning where it says yes, I understand, Every life must end no way, I can't make this shit.
Speaker 2:That is awesome oh my god, I don't even know how that happened. I do have that in my music, but I'm not touching my phone. There would be no reason for it to go off. We know a good reason well, there is, I know why it went off they're so, aren't they awesome?
Speaker 1:hi grandma, hi grandpa, it's so that's really nice so just confirmation that they're in this conversation with us. Yeah, exactly, because you know just that part of that song, that particular song that just matches what you were just saying I mean, how perfect is that I love it.
Speaker 2:Wow, I do. I love it. I wish everybody could have more of a lighthearted approach to death.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, me too.
Speaker 2:I wish that people didn't have that fear. It is so. I mean, rebecca, you know it's so wonderful to walk through life and not have that fear. It's just such a wonderful, wonderful feeling. Fear. It's just such a wonderful, wonderful feeling and it's so hard when you see people that you know are so fearful of death, right Be it their own, their families, oh it's such it's so hard to see that.
Speaker 2:But yeah, so he had a. Really he had a really good death. I think him and my grandmother both had a really really good death. And just his last statement to my brother, my brother says I'll never forget it. I'll never forget those words and those are the last things that he spoke.
Speaker 1:Sorry, that's incredible.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's great.
Speaker 1:That's exactly why I want to have these conversations, because I've been saying for a long time people take life way too seriously and they take death way too seriously. When somebody is ready to die, let them die. You know, something in them knows that this is just good timing. You know we do this with pets too. Yeah, you know pets will. They're ready to go and people are trying to keep them here and doing everything they can to possibly keep this pet alive longer. What's the point?
Speaker 2:in that I know.
Speaker 1:I know. You know, if somebody's done, they're done. We should honor that. We do have an instinct to survive. That's built into us and that's what keeps us here when it's really rough. But that instinct will sort of disappear when it's really rough. But that instinct will sort of disappear when it's really time to go and we should just honor that. Because even though our instinct says I'm staying, that doesn't mean that we should sort of impose that on somebody else and say that means you should stay too. Right, and what a beautiful way to go. You know, no drama. Right, and what a beautiful way to go. You know, no drama, no trauma, Just hey, you know what, guys, I'm going to die now. Yeah, Even though the medical professionals are saying but we can fix this and you can stay longer, it doesn't make any sense to us that you don't take this treatment.
Speaker 1:Exactly we should still honor that. You know that I don't have to. I have, like your, your step-grandmother I have the freedom and maybe a freedom that I didn't realize most of my life that I had and I can make decisions. And I'm making this one because this just feels good to me, it feels right to me and it feels like it's just time exactly.
Speaker 2:It was just beautiful that she got to do it on her terms when she had spent a lifetime of doing everything on other people's terms. And yeah, I can't imagine a better way to leave this experience. And they both very much. They were, both had a lot of faith in their religious beliefs and everything and all that. So they really didn't have neither one of them had any fear. There was no resistance, they had no fear, and this is what can happen when you don't have any fear.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I agree. I mean with your step-grandma. She gave into her condition, so that gave her a nice easy vehicle. But what I think is so incredible with your grandfather is that he really didn't have a condition Like he had the pain in his stomach, but that could have been you know no big deal, because he had that. He went through that so many times, so it's not like he gave into an illness that would go ahead and give him his exit. He just simply made the decision and then let the exit appear.
Speaker 2:He you know we all think of that like, oh, I just want to. And people will say that, like I hope I die in my sleep, I don't want to have to, like deal with all this, or like I just want to close my eyes and be gone.
Speaker 1:And that's what he did he closed his eyes, rebecca and he left, because we do have the freedom to do that. And there have been many people through the years yogis and you know whatever who just say it's time for me to leave my body.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And they, they, they exit the focus and they, they withdraw from the body. So we know that it's something that can be done. We know that it's something that's easy and I'm sure it's available to all of us. So I think, as we understand this more and relax about death and honor it and celebrate it, we're not going to have to go through the extreme means of exit that we do, that most people do. Right, you know we don't need the big things to yank us out of our focus. Right, you know we don't need the big things to, you know, yank us out of our focus. Right, you know we can just withdraw.
Speaker 2:Honestly like I just wish more people could be lighthearted about it and yeah, it would be, it would be great but I but I love that we make this example for, like the medical staff, because while they're all thinking we're probably like certifiably insane, it does give them food for thought, right? Because even when my dad was dying and we were joking and he was going to die, there was no way around it. You know now my dad lingered because he was much more resistant to it. He had a lot more fear around it, but but he also did pass quicker than the nursing staff thought that he was going to. They had told us he had like maybe two weeks and he died within a couple hours. Like I said, I've sat at the bedsides of quite a few dying people. I've seen the difference between resisting and not resisting.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And yeah, the not resisting is a beautiful thing.
Speaker 1:And you know, it's not unusual for people who have not been doing well to suddenly get like a little burst of life not long before they die. And that goes to show you too that there's life in dying, right. Right, you know, there's a sort of an awakening that's happening before they actually withdraw from the physical experience.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I like that. My grandmother was saying that she was seeing her father. She'd been very close to her father in life and it wasn't the first time that she had been in a hospital where she had told me she had seen her father. So you know, to me that was always going to be, so you know, to me that was always going to be the spirit and soul that she would see when she made her transition. And then for my grandfather, with my brother saying well, I'm just thinking about them. I'm like, no, no, no, you're seeing. You know, he was seeing our grandmother and our biological grandmother and our step grandmother that's who was coming for my grandfather. And I think that's also important because while they had lived in life, being so judged, these two sisters were coming together. These two souls, right, who aren't bogged down with human emotion and judgment, were coming and saying, okay, we'll lead you over.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's a good point Because you know, when we're not in a physical body with the personality stuff that we've added to that body, there isn't that resentment or anger. You know, like you said, neither one of those souls was saying look, you gave us a hard time, right, right, and we went through a lot of crap with you, so you're on your own when you die, like we're somewhere else, we're not even going to pay attention to you. There's, there's none of that, because we all understand outside of this life what the game is. You know, we know that it's not easy here and we know that we get dug in and maybe twisted or confused or take it so seriously. And it's all for good reason. There's so much information and expansion in all of it, so we understand that from that broader perspective and that's just proof of it.
Speaker 2:It is, it really is. And something else I remember on another podcast you did was someone saying about like, when someone dies, if they've kind of had a tortured life or done bad things in their life, well they have this tortured, bad ending. And my grandfather, like I said, was a very difficult man. A lot of people didn't get along with him. He was an alcoholic. For a very, very long time he was in World War II. He had contributed to the death of other humans in that war and that was something that always weighed on him. It weighed on him that he knew he had not been an ideal husband or father. He knew this At the end of his life. He was aware of it, but none of that hindered his death process. We as humans are always like punishment, punishment, punishment, and Spirit isn't like that. So no, it didn't hinder him. His experience in this life did not hinder him into having a beautiful end.
Speaker 1:And I think Spirit looks at us and relates to us in a way that we might an analogy for that might be, if we think about a child. You know, if you see a small child step on a bug, you don't say you're an evil soul, you just killed a creature. Or if they destroy your decor in your house, put magic marker all over it. Or put peanut butter all over the dog and the kitchen you know, whatever it might be.
Speaker 1:We don't look at them and say you're bad, you're terrible. We have to treat you differently now, because you've done this. You need rehabilitated.
Speaker 1:I mean we don't think that you know that brands you. You're terrible. You've done, you know, six or seven or 10 things in the last two weeks alone that we can condemn you for. We don't think to do that with a child, because we understand the child is learning, the child is expanding. That doesn't. They're just doing what seems like a good idea in the moment and that's what we are all doing here. Exactly.
Speaker 1:That's how Source views us is, yeah, they went into this crazy maze that is beautiful and has a whole lot of purpose to it, but navigating in that maze can be very choppy, very choppy, and so they fully understand how we get mean or or you know why we hurt other people and things like that.
Speaker 1:It's. We're not, we're not really in trouble for any of it and none of it's wrong. You know, the people that he might've killed in that war met with their means of exit, right of which he provided, because things sync up as they do, right, you know, and we are calling the shots here and I think we're, we're learning more quickly now, especially to ease up about all of that, yeah, to understand that that person that I just shot had a family and they were only here because they were made to be here and fight, or maybe they believed in this fight, but they believed in it because of their own confusion. You know they believe that we should be fighting each other and you know we will get more compassionate and more understanding. You know, just like, in a way, the source views us. I think we're starting to see each other better that way. Like your grandfather, like you mentioned to me before when we talked that, you know your grandmother would your original grandmother would no sooner sit down for dinner and he would say get me a cup of coffee.
Speaker 2:He did that to both of them, but yeah. Yeah, oh there you go.
Speaker 1:So you know, that was the way that, just his maybe, the way he was raised, just the way other people it was just seemed like a good idea to him. It just seemed like that's what we do, without thinking Maybe she's tired, maybe she doesn't need to be my gopher.
Speaker 1:Maybe that's not why, caretaker, but he didn't have the expansion. He saw it later in life, because life is a great teacher. But he couldn't see it then. He was just too close up to his own conditions, you know, and way of life. And so you know, without the, he was doing the best he could in that moment. Because that's what we're all doing With what's in us at this moment. We're doing the best we can right now. But that's always changing and maybe he had days where he could be more compassionate. So he was doing the best he could in that moment with what he had. You know, we fluctuate.
Speaker 2:Right right.
Speaker 1:But he kept doing better and better and better and recognizing as he got older that you know he really got some serious stuff going on. He really got caught up in the reality and the way where people say we're supposed to be doing this life and that, you know, we just start to figure it out Right In time.
Speaker 1:You know, we just start to figure it out in time and he figured it out well enough that he found those words to share with your brother that were very dear and very true. Those words he probably wouldn't have, they wouldn't have come out of him when he was younger.
Speaker 1:No, they would not have, they would not have, and that's what we call wisdom. So through all of that stuff, all the muck and mire and everything, he was gaining wisdom Right, and that's why I think that you know another thing aside from honoring death and that whole process, I think we need to honor the journey that each person is having, because there's always honey in all of it, even when we can't see it, and it all has purpose for the whole of why we're here, and that's how you get to non-judgment.
Speaker 2:I agree with you and I know that sometimes really hard to remember when we're in the midst of some sort of human thing going on.
Speaker 2:But one more thing I want to add is that when my step grandmother married my grandfather and so many people were in the community that they lived in a really small community, you know we're looking at them like they were some sort of way and the judgment that they got I know my, my aunt, their youngest, my grandfather's youngest child, I think to this day still struggles with it, like she didn't like the fact that they got married. But some years ago, when I was having a conversation with my grandmother this might have been like 15 years ago I was having a conversation with my grandmother and that's when I had kind of said, hey, I always had this feeling that Marietta I mean, I know, if I was dying and I had children that needed taken care of and I knew my husband was going to get remarried, my only thought would be about my kids, right? And so I had speculated this. And that's when my step grandmother confirmed that they had talked about it. Marietta had said why don't you marry him? You know they had this about it. Marietta had said why don't you marry him? You know they had this whole conversation.
Speaker 2:And so well, so many people place judgment on them, right? So many people view that as like sick and wrong. And how could you do that? How could you sleep with your sister's husband and blah, blah, blah, all this stuff Like why. That was like who cares about that? Right, she's taking care of her nieces and nephews. And for me, from my perspective, and my grandmother at the time, my step-grandmother at the time, said to me this worked out for all of us, sorry, and you know what.
Speaker 2:She's right, because for me I would not if my grandfather would marry just some random person. I would not have had the ability to know that side of my family, which has brought me great joy. And I don't know that I'd be here right now, in this moment, telling you this story, if everything didn't play out the way that it played out, because if he would have married someone else, maybe I wouldn't have been as close with him. I don't know, I may have not even had any interaction with my step-grandmother, right? I don't know. So for me, yeah, I mean, I can definitely look at it and say and even when I think of the worst experiences in my life that I've had, I know that everything happens for a reason and there is, as you always say, rebecca, honey and everything, and I do all I can to pick that honey out because you have taught me well.
Speaker 2:Good, because it is always there, no matter what it is no matter how we want to label something, the honey's in there, exactly, exactly, matter what it is, no matter how we want to label something.
Speaker 1:The honey's in there, exactly, exactly, and you know. When we look at it that way, you begin to understand that life isn't torturing anybody, that things aren't bad. They might be unwanted or unliked sometimes and when you start to unravel that, you don't get so much of that because you get easier about life and you start to see that, okay, I might not like this right now, but where's the honey, Where's the good stuff? And then the whole thing shifts into something that's not torturous or not bad. It may be still be unwanted, but you get.
Speaker 1:You start to see the backstory, you know, and you start to see that there is a really deep and very interesting reason why everything is occurring and we can get the benefit always getting it, but we get it. Oftentimes people get it in really long, drawn out, hard ways and that's all right. But that's another thing I'm trying to get out there to people is to lighten up, find that ease, look for the honey, because I care about every person, but I also care about this whole thing that we have going on here on this planet.
Speaker 1:I don't care about every person, but I also care about this whole thing that we have going on here on this planet. We're shifting and the more people that are looking at what is working and what they do like and what they do want, the better this is going to be, the smoother it's going to go and the more fun it's going to be.
Speaker 2:That all sounds wonderful to me, definitely.
Speaker 1:Well, you know, that piece, I'm going to leave that in. Oh good, I'll find a way to leave that in. What happened on your cell phone with that song? Okay, good, good, because it was incredible timing, oh my.
Speaker 2:God, it was.
Speaker 1:They're so awesome Rebecca, it was a perfect song yeah, it was.
Speaker 2:That's just so cool and right at the beginning, when it says yes, I understand that every life must end. That was exactly the sentence I heard. I mean, I don't know how that happened. I was not touching, I know how it happened.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, we know exactly how it happened.
Speaker 2:Oh, that's beautiful, I love it. Oh, my goodness, I love it, I love it.
Speaker 1:Well, thanks, kimberly, I I really appreciate you sharing the story. This is really interesting stuff and and I really hope that people listen to the ease in this and understand that, whether it's their death or somebody else's death, ease is available. Even if you, they, have a health condition or an accident what we call an accident, the ease is there.
Speaker 2:I agree, it's a beautiful thing really.
Speaker 1:So thank you very much. You're welcome very much. So I want to thank everyone who has listened to this and I really want to give a nice shout out to the people of Pennsylvania. There are a lot of people in Pennsylvania listening to the show and I appreciate you all. If anyone would like some personal guidance or direction, you can find me at mysticaltruthscom. You.