Where's the Honey in THIS?

What if the question you’ve been asking is the very thing keeping you stuck?

When life feels confusing, painful, disappointing, or overwhelming, most of us instinctively ask:
“Why is this happening?”

But what if there’s a better question?

In this episode of Where’s the Honey?, we explore the meaning behind the phrase that inspired this entire podcast—and how learning to look for “the honey” can completely shift the way you experience your life.

Because this isn’t about pretending hard things are easy.

It’s the hidden insight.
The unexpected growth.
The truth, clarity, healing, or perspective that may exist beneath the surface of what feels difficult right now.

Inside this episode:

• Why we naturally focus on what’s wrong
• How we drown out inner guidance
• The difference between arguing to get what you want & inviting it
• How you can 'fog up' your journey forward

You don’t need to have everything figured out.

Sometimes finding even one small drop of honey is enough to begin.

So… where’s the honey in this for you?

Your Likes, Follow, Subscribe, and Shares are noticed & appreciated. 

HoneyinEverything.com
rebecca@HoneyinEverything.com

A big TY to CreativeCommons.org
Audiorezout. 14.Be Happy.mp3
for the music. 

Transcript

The Question Behind The Title

Rebecca 0:12

Hi, this is Rebecca. The title of this podcast can be asked in a variety of ways. From Hmm, where's the honey in this? To Where is the honey THIS? All the way to... WHERE is the honey in THIS?!!!! Or something like that. So from a kind of confused or unsure curiosity all the way to complete and total frustration. And no matter which state you're in, or it's being asked from, it's a really important question. So let's look at the 'how to' part. Like, how do we find that juicy stuff? And it's not, "Is there any?" There is always some. But it might not be really obvious at first. Because what do you do when you feel stuck or confused, blown over by something, overwhelmed, depleted, dot dot dot. The typical, sort of, default questions tend to be... Why is this happening? Will it ever end? Could this get any worse? What exactly am I supposed to do about this? Where did this come from? Why me? Why now? The answer is because. That's why. Because this is the stuff of life. And it's how we roll with it, how we perceive it, that determines the version of it or the situation that we get. So instead of those questions that they're just not really helpful, especially if they're asked in a frustrated or negative way, because we generally don't have the answers to those.

Better Question When You Feel Stuck

Rebecca 2:35

So instead, "Where's the honey in this?" Yes, admit it, this sucks. Or it's hard. Or I don't like it. But is there, could there be, a hidden gem or gems in here? And again, I'm not talking - I've mentioned this in the opening episode. - I'm not talking about fake positivity and pretending that hard things are easy. That doesn't work. The how is seeing the meaning, the growth, a new fresh look at it. Something useful or valuable. Asking yourself, could this possibly have any purpose or good stuff or insight or new direction in it? And , if at first you think, I don't know, I got nothin'. Hang on. Keep sniffing around it. For example, years ago, many years ago, my daughter was three months old. I left her father, moved into my mother's basement. It was hard. She was colicky. I was a first-time mom who uprooted and had to start fresh. Work was extremely chaotic. I was getting -hardly any sleep. And one morning at the hospital lab, something just brought me to my breaking point. I had to get out. I HAD to get out. But I was told I couldn't leave. So I felt trapped. And I quit.

A Breaking Point That Opened Doors

Rebecca 4:46

As devastated as I was... because I had a child, I decided that broke could not be an option. And keep in mind, I had no idea how to find any good in my situation. I was not quickly employable, like a nurse or a doctor, but I just could not accept that there were no options. So because of that, within days, I saw an ad for a teaching position in the field in which I was trained. I applied, I got. Consider, before I quit the hospital, (and this is where the honey is) before I quit the hospital, the day I quit, the days after, I never thought of teaching. Or that that would be the direction I was headed in. I didn't know. Everything coming to a head, so to speak, and me quitting was the beginning of many years of teaching in and out of the medical field. It was the sweet, unexpected start of where I am now. It wasn't easy. Because, back then, I didn't know how to put ease into it as well as I do today. So don't think the unexpected or the unwanted is NOT life working out for you. Even though sometimes it just seems hopeless. The decision that something had to work out... I didn't know what. I had no idea. The determination that something had to work, brought the honey. And you know, keep in mind, way back then, law of attraction was pretty much unknown. I certainly had never heard about it, but it still was real. It's always been. So, why do we so often miss it?

Why We Miss The Hidden Value

Rebecca 7:25

Why do we miss the 'valuable' in the hard stuff. There are a lot of reasons, but mostly because we're trained to focus on what's wrong or the unliked, the issue. Fear can get pretty loud and then just drown out our perspective and our inner guidance. And because when something feels bad, we assume that it is bad. And often we're just too close up - we're looking at it from the outside in, instead of the other way around. So just because something feels bad or your logic is telling you that it's bad, never means there's nothing good in it for you. But then, too, you know, if something truly feels off, it is off. That's not a problem. The off feeling is just data, it's guidance to help you get back on. So how do we make that shift from "Oh no!", to a curious, "All right? What's really happening here?" And did you catch that? All right, all is right. What is really happening? And if your reply is, "I don't know, I just don't know." Pay attention. Look for what I call the little breadcrumbs along the way as you go forward. Just be alert, be aware, be expecting that there are breadcrumbs, there are little nuggets that you can pick up along the way -that you don't know what they're building up to be, but something feels good, something seems like a good thing to do at the time. Little things begin to build. Because nothing really changes externally, at least not at first. It has to happen from the inside. So it's how we're looking at it that may need to change. If we don't feel good, it's definitely how we're looking at it that needs to change. So we're not fixing life, we're just seeing it differently, so we can see a better way forward, so that we can be vibrationally available to a version that we do like, an outcome, a change that feels good to us that we do like. It's like adjusting a lens or lighting. You look at it from a different, broader perspective.

The Fog And The Forks Ahead

Rebecca 10:45

So, like for example, imagine you're walking along a path and it abruptly comes to an end. You quit your job, a loved one dies, suddenly everything seems foggy. It's just hard to see if there is any way forward. You want to keep going on, then you think, well, maybe I see a few forks in the road. Two, or is it three? So you try to look harder. No, it's only one, and it looks terrible. You only see one, so you go. Ugh. But actually, there were several forks in the road, multiple ways forward. They varied from really hard to hard to pretty hard to not great, to okay, to easy, to pretty good, to really good, and so on. They were all right there for you. And some version of them still is. So the problem in this scenario is the fog set in, or the unsureness set in, the unhappy, the unwanted set in. And instead of relaxing into it, we try to look harder, we try to figure it out, we try, try, try, and it just gets murkier, and we look for other ways, and we can't, we're sort of vibrationally, well, we're not sort of, we are vibrationally lowering ourselves out of the realms of possibilities that are there. Because when you're in the fog, you just you can't see clearly. You don't have vibrational access to those other possibilities. But if you stand there briefly, bring your attention to the moment, take a deep breath, let your perspective, your vision adjust. Some of the other ways will be seeable to you, especially the sweet ones. Even if you don't relax enough to see the best ones, you'll still see at least a really good one. Start there. Sounds easy, but it can take a while to kind of get your your momentum with this. And that's okay. If it does, that's fine. Just stick with me, we'll get there. So, what about your life? Think of a relationship, a situation that you learned some things from. You expanded. Or a time when something just didn't make sense, and then later it did. So, just a light example. Last year, my family and I stepped into a unit at a Florida resort only to find out there weren't enough beds. For not for all of us, anyway. There were beds, just not enough for all of us. And we all thought, how could that be? I mean, I booked it correctly. And my family began to wonder and kind of worry how it could even be possible that the resort would have another townhouse available since it was a holiday week. I called the main desk, and in so many words, I asked, "Where's the honey in this?" And I heard, "um uh, we'll call you back."

Honey In Small Problems And Big Ones

Rebecca 13:55

So, in pretty short time, we were in a nicer unit in a much better spot. It worked out so well. That was a happy accident for sure. You know, and it is true though that some people make that kind of a call and scream and threaten until they get what they want. They get the better place with the perfect space they want. But which way feels better? Which one had more ease in it? But what about the things that we call more serious? For example, one of my clients many years ago, he and his wife drove over an hour to come and see me. And he was in stage four cancer. Great couple. He was so "in it" and out of his element, ...but he wanted more. He wanted to find the good stuff, but he was so in it at the time that I would do energy work as well with him. And so I would play light light music in the background. It took us a while to find music he could tolerate or nature sounds that he could tolerate. He was just so sensitive and so out of his good spot, that even nice music or nature sounds, he just couldn't couldn't go there. But eventually he eased enough that we could play that music, and it did soothe him. I thought it was interesting that even beautiful music or nice nature sounds, he just couldn't couldn't go there. And he did very well with all of it. Lived for many years after that. Continued to come and see me every once in a while, and just check in, hit his reset button, and lived for quite a long time. It was pretty fascinating. I use him as an example for many reasons, still today. So it doesn't matter, there's no right or wrong way. It's just the way we choose, the the attitude, what we'll settle for, or what we're not willing to settle for. He wasn't willing to settle for misery.

Rebecca 16:23

So, how do you start? You just you don't need the full answers or solutions, or you don't need to know the outcome when something hits you -when you're in a space you don't want to be in. But you do have to have that willingness to just look in the direction, ask yourself questions in the direction of relief. One little insight, one shift, one drop is a start.

Breadcrumbs Relief And The 68 Seconds

Rebecca 16:56

And if you put your attention there, in the direction of relief or solution, for as little as 68 seconds, more will begin to assemble behind the scenes. You'll only know it if you pay attention to how you'll feel, because you'll feel a little bit better, a little bit of relief. That's your clue, that's your sign that behind the scenes, all of creation is matching you. You're matching it in that space, and then the domino effect kicks in, and solutions, answers, insights especially, begin to be seen by you. And you notice I didn't say they begin to show up, they're always there. All kinds of different versions of them. But you they you begin to see them, you begin to sync up with them and to cross by them. And the better it gets, the better it gets. You know, even asking yourself the question, " W hat if this is some odd version of things working out for me?" And I know when we're in a really rough place, we don't even want to hear that question. When you're really mad or feeling powerless or lost or whatever, the vibrational difference between that state of being and the question, "Uh, what if this is just some odd version of life working out for me?" The vibrational difference between those two is too big of a jump to take all at one time, oftentimes, for people. So as we go through these episodes, I'll show you more about how to go from maybe just little baby steps from complete rage or anger or fear into something a little bit better and a little bit better. Because even when you're in complete rage or hatred, anger feels a little bit better. Resentment feels a little bit better than that, even. So sometimes it's just, and and you know, all of life will lead you up the that emotional ladder. That's an Abraham-Hicks thing, the emotional guidance scale, I believe it's called. If you just relax enough, just enough, or have enough expectation, life will show you these little ways , and this is where you we find the honey in anger, blame, jealousy, rage, all that stuff. Because some of it feels a little bit better than the last one, some of it feels just a little, it's it still doesn't feel good, but it feels a little bit better. But we'll get more into that as we go through time. So, in these episodes, we'll find honey all over the place, and we'll expand on the 'how to' part.

Emotional Steps And Listener Invitation

Rebecca 20:15

If you'd like to see some sweetness in your unwanted situation, I'd love to hear from you. Go to honeyineverything.com. Send me an email. Rebecca@ honeyineverything.com. Let me know where you're stuck or where you can't see the goodness. Maybe what you're experiencing can be helpful to other people here. I can share your story if you are okay with that. And if it matches you, please like, subscribe, follow, all of that fun stuff, and share these episodes. If you think what I just talked about can help somebody else or just be relief for someone else, share it with them. Until next time, softly ask yourself, "Where's the honey in.... you fill in the blank. Stay sweet out there.